Hey Extrovert, You’re Gonna be Fine

Another week of self-quarantine has wrapped up in my house. We’re at week two, day four now. (My husband and I take a shot each night to count the days, and to celebrate getting through the day. 😉 ) Today, the official ‘shelter-in-place’ order kicked in. It won’t really change anything for us. (The biggest change, I guess, will be the kids starting online learning on Monday.) We’ve started to find a groove around the house. We’ve settled in. We’re getting along pretty good. The kids are finding fun in the everyday stuff. And, we’re all just here, until we’re not again. For now though, I’m not taking a moment of this for granted. (The only thing that could make this better for me is if I wasn’t living in the burbs–and, instead, much more in the North. In the woods. But, I’m definitely not complaining. )

Here’s where I do have concern in all of this though. I am watching extroverted friends of mine fall to the wayside. They’re sad, their sense of humor is dwindling, they’re lonely, they’re bored, they’re feeling trapped. And then there’s me. I feel like I’m thriving. I’m living, even if just for a minute, the life I’m most comfortable with. I am so content. Life lately, to me, feels as comfortable as a Friday evening, with the knowledge of a quiet weekend ahead. Ya know…that feeling when you get into your pajamas, sit down on the couch, and know you have very little to do until Monday. It’s that feeling of comfort, and happiness, and love. That’s where I’m at as this week draws to an end. I am happy, and content. (And, when compared to where I started this week–this is a huge deal to me.) 

Then, I get a little bit annoyed, as I think–do my extrovert friends, the currently miserable ones, ever feel bad that the world they prefer isn’t ‘introvert’ friendly? Do they feel bad when an introverted friend is dragged into an uncomfortably loud party? What about a work event that features ‘fun’ games to break the ice, and liven things up? Or, does the extrovert just try to get the introvert to be comfortable by telling them to loosen up, chill out, or just go mingle? My favorite, and the option I typically have to start with, is when I’m told to have another drink, or smoke a little more, just so I can have fun. (Literally, all of these things are things I’ve been told.) Do they really understand their quieter friends when they say they want to stay in and watch a movie–or, do they try to talk them into hanging out instead? What if I were to tell my sad, extroverted friends to just calm down and read a book–because they’ll cheer up that way? Or, maybe if I said they just need to have a little quite time to think, and another cup of coffee? What if I told them they’d have a lot more fun if they just calmed down a little bit? I mean–idk, but I think if I said any of that stuff, I’d be rude as hell, right? (I’m really not trying to cause more division in our already divisive world with this. These are just thoughts I’ve had, as I sit with my quiet time, and extra cup of coffee. 😉 I totally understand how extroverts are feeling–due to feeling much the same way while being forced out of my comfort zone.)

Anyway, the world was set up by extroverts, for extroverts, for all these years. (Because, d’uh. They’re the ones out there doing stuff. It only makes sense.) Right now though, everything is quiet–and, to me, it feels beautiful. I can feel the calm all around me. I can hear the birds louder. I can smell things bigger. I can think clearer. I appreciate others more than ever. I have peace in my heart like I’ve rarely known…and, it’s all because of a pandemic, and at the expense of my extrovert friends. I’m probably a terrible person for feeling how I feel. I do feel bad they are forced into this whole introverted ‘party’…but, at the same time, if I can survive their world, they can survive this one. (I’m a jerk. Don’t hate me. Love you, extroverts. You WILL be okay, promise. And yes, we are all in this together.)

We scavenger hunted through the yard to find signs of Spring. Little things like this sure do give me a huge amount of hope.

 

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